The Politicians We’d Shag

27 Nov

If you’ve been paying attention, you might have noticed a common thread among the ladies here. It’s certainly not that we’re all single. Ayn and JoZ have both jumped ship into the ocean (of alternating bliss and frustration) called marriage.  No, the common denominator is our love for shamed, vilified or badass politicians.

Putin riding bareback

Vladimir Putin

Why Ayn loves him? It is rumored that he used to work as an assassin for the KGB. Also, he has the deadliest nipples east of Cairo. His  stare is so intense that one cannot help but disrobe when he nods in your direction. I’d love to see him throw it down with Chief Strong Jaw for Ayn’s honor, but I really like the Chief and want him to live to see 30, just so I can call him “Old Man”.

The governator gets a chemical peel.

Arnold Schwarzenneger

Why swampmusic loves him? Two words – Blue Room. Just ask her if you happen to meet her. It’s a real elbow-burner of a story. The Governator of California is loved for his past playing that famous cyborg sent through time once to kill Sarah Conor, then to save John Conor, then to save John Conor again, and finally to do a naked cameo with all the wrinkles CGIed off his aging ass. Also, swampmusic has a serious obsession with metal. Hence her affection for Dr. Doom, Optimus Prime, Doc Oc, Iron Man, mustangs, tanks …

"I fart in your general direction!"

Rahm Emanuel

Why RetroVixen loves him? What’s not to love? 80% of people in Washington D.C. are afraid of him. The remaining 20% are either related to him or in bed with him. He speaks his mind and isn’t afraid to bitchslap the competition into submission. It’s his take charge attitude, political moxie and the arrogance brimming on insanity that melts RV‘s panties at the mere mention of his name. Try not to call her when he’s giving an interview on television. Seriously, don’t call.

What happened to you, bb?

Tony Blair

Why Nibby loves him? Honestly, I don’t have a clue. He’s just … I dunno. Even after his disgraceful handling of the whole “let’s bomb Iraq back into the Stone Age because our f**kbuddy George Bush wants us to” fiasco, Nibs still loves him and was sad to see him replaced by the less visually pleasing Gordon Brown. I am sure there are some women out there who find Gordon Brown attractive, but I’ve yet to meet one.


3 Responses to “The Politicians We’d Shag”

  1. wickedvikinglover November 30, 2009 at 9:51 pm #

    Putin? Absolutely.

    • singlarity December 1, 2009 at 9:43 pm #

      Putin is just asking for it, really.


  1. We’d Still Shag You « - October 1, 2010

    […] the next mayor of Chicago, or simply a car-pooling Dad just know that you are still among the politicians we’d shag. You're unforgettable … unlike Matt […]

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