True Advice: True Blood Does A Body and Mind Good

13 Jan

While the show True Blood is just a guilty-pleasure for most, for me it is almost a full-time obsession. I’ve watched both seasons on numerous occasions and like to take note of all the valuable lessons I’ve learned. One thing I have noticed is the show’s love for men with really well defined abs. While none of the men on the show could be classified as normal, they seem pretty well-adjusted, that is, able to deal with all the crazy shit that goes on in Bon Temps. Join me as I go over some of the mental and physical health lessons I’ve gleaned from two seasons of True Blood.

Lesson 1: Build upper-body strength

Make racerback tanks part of your gym ensemble

Look at Alexander Skarsgard’s transformation in just a few short years. He’s definitely got broader shoulders and more defined biceps and triceps. His pecs are pectacular. On the show, Eric keeps himself in great shape by bench-pressing vampire-haters and v-dealers. Also, those people who use religion to preach hate (e.g. Steve Newlin) make great dumbbells. Both men and women can benefit greatly from improved upper-body strength. Stronger shoulders and back muscles help to keep your spine in alignment.

Lesson 2: Be there for others

Sometimes our own troubles seem insurmountable and sometimes it feels like you’re drowning in your own shit that you’ve got nothing left to give, but this is exactly the time when you must give. Being there for others even when chaos rules your own life helps to put things in perspective. Things could always be worse, and for some one out there, it actually is. Taking a break from your own problems and dealing with someone else’s can be rejuvenating and empowering.

Lesson 3: Minimize your Middle

0% Body Fat. Unfortunately, not available in your grocer's freezer.


As we all know, carrying excess weight around the middle can be detrimental to your health. It can also make for a disgusting sight if you’re Mike Spencer and you’re lying naked on Sookie Stackhouse’s kitchen floor or if you’re Andy Bellefleur and you dance like “an epileptic on meth”. So, take a page from Jason Stackhouse – work out like a mofo and watch lots of “educational” porn. You’ll learn stuff.

Lesson 4: Don’t bottle things up

I (heart) heart-to-hearts

Dealing with trauma, stress or grief is a lot easier if you allow someone else to share the burden with you. Who better than someone who shares the same experiences or has always been there for you in the past? Lafayette found a kindred spirit in Terry Bellefleur while dealing with the fallout of his imprisonment and torture by Eric. No one is ever truly alone. NO ONE. Jason went looking for meaning and purpose in all the wrong places following the death of his grandmother, the deaths of his lovers, Maudette, Dawn and Amy and the death of Eddie by the hands of Amy. He couldn’t tell Sookie, or his best friend Hoyt about his inner turmoil. Instead telling a stranger, Sarah Newlin, who exploited Jason’s confusion and made things worse.

Lesson 5: Don’t forget about your legs, hips and thighs

Eric regularly flexes his leg muscles to drop kick or launch the latest annoying fangbanger at Fangtasia into the next Sheriff’s area. Lafayette likes to get a good workout by swinging his hips, squatting and gyrating for Eric or on video for his many legions of fans. As a result, the consummate entrepreneur has a great pair of gams. It’s great when you can find a way to exercise without it feeling like work.

Lesson 6: Get in the water

The water looks inviting

I’ve struggled with my weight my whole life. The best shape I have ever been in is when I was 14 and went swimming 3 times per week. Back then I really wasn’t concerned about how I looked in a bathing suit and I was the fastest, beating the boys in my swim class regularly. I don’t swim now because I can’t abide chlorine, but these new salt-water pools are giving me hope that very soon I could be making a return to the pool. Sam Merlotte enjoys a relaxing swim every now and then. Swimming is great because of the low impact on your joints.


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