I’m just being honest

12 Jul

I’ve decided that Monday is the best day to get stuff out in the open. This week, I will be listing the 7 things that turn me off from a dude’s online profile aside from  smoking six packs a day and not knowing the difference between “they’re”, “there” and “their”.

1. Being vague, using clichés or being too general. I’ll give you an example:

I like honesty and openness in a relationship. I also like women with two eyes and ten toes.

2. Being too specific and weird. I hate it when guys insist that the person they are looking for must love to do a particular activity or worse a particular set of activities. Here’s an example:

I like to scrapbook and spend many hours a week scrapbooking. It is essential that you share my interests, otherwise there is something seriously wrong with you and I pity you from the bottom of my prickish heart.

3. No pictures, old pictures, group pictures, out-of-focus pictures, faraway pictures, a billion photos of you with other people’s children, pictures with your motorcycle, truck, car, boat or object from which you derive 99% of your self-esteem (and that includes photos in which your legs are splayed and your package is a focal point).

Drunk partying photos are a turn off, even if you look like Michael Jordan

4. Going on and on about your golf game, your expertise as a fisherman, your collection of X, your obsession with hockey

5. You list “workaholic” as opposed to “strong work ethic” as a good quality. There is a difference. I really don’t need to explain that. I work to live, not live to work.

6. “I’m just looking to see what’s out there.” Really? Could you be more generic? That combined with “I’ll let you cry on my shoulder” scares the shit out of me.

7. One or more of the following words are part of your username: Northern, southern, urban, cowboy, country, city, rat, hard, long, big, professor, lady-killer, LOL, cuddly, randy, hot, hottie, hott, hotz, hawt, baby, bad, boner, score, new in town (seriously?), rocket, rocky, rock …


2 Responses to “I’m just being honest”

  1. CINDY ASHLEY MILLER July 13, 2010 at 7:37 pm #

    Luv ur post….wish i could sum all of it up, in just 7 steps…as u did sooo candidly 🙂

    • Singlarity July 13, 2010 at 8:12 pm #

      Hey, thanks. I’m checking out your blog now. 🙂

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