The Bieber Removal Act of 2010

3 Nov


My friend, Nimbo Katz, and fellow Lady of Singlarity, Ayn Rant, have forged a piece of legislation in the hopes of improving Canadian-American relations. They have proposed that Canada take back Justin Bieber and relieve many Americans of the suffering (mostly debilitating headaches and seizures) he has caused. Canada refuses to take Bieber back without some quid pro quo.

Canada has countered that America has ruined the lives of many Canadians by allowing Stephanie Meyer’s sickness (a.k.a. Twilight) to reach across the border and poison the Canadian youth. While Canadians cannot blame America for Robert Pattinson’s vapid existence (Thanks, Great Britain!), they can blame America for the proliferation of magazine covers displaying Kristen Stewart’s vacant gaze and saccharin smile – signs of the End of Days.


The lights are on but nobody's home

So a deal is on the table. If America is willing to remove the Twilight fungus, Canada agrees to take back Justin Bieber, lesbian hair and all. Who will be brave enough to make this deal happen? Will we be willing to set aside petty differences and come together in this just cause to save our two countries from what is certain annihilation?

Hey, it could happen, just like peace in the Middle East.


2 Responses to “The Bieber Removal Act of 2010”

  1. missberlish November 4, 2010 at 9:10 pm #

    Seems like a fair trade, beiber for beaver LOL

  2. rissa5150 November 7, 2010 at 4:03 am #

    hahahaha!!! i loved it. and fair trade…lol, lesbian hair!

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