The Fart Test Redux

Thanks to @djmom70 for pointing out a not so small problem with the fart test. While it is important to be comfortable around your significant other, there is such a thing as being too comfortable. I would hate to be in a relationship where conversations are interrupted with “Did you just …?” and arguments are won by sheer blast power. I would like to think my mate would be comfortable farting in front of me but would also respect my olfactory senses enough to exercise restraint.

"Did he just ..."

These things are essential in any relationship. A man who will fart in your presence and not own up to it is a coward. A man who will fart in your presence and not apologize is an asshole. That’s when you know he’s taking you for granted.

The Fart Test

Compatibility is key to a successful coupling. After a first date, my friends and I like to do a post-mortem and analyze it to death. I always get asked if we had chemistry, if I found him attractive, if  I could  see myself lying next to him every night for the rest of my life, if I liked the way he smelled, did we laugh a lot and was it relaxed laughter or nervous laughter. For me, one of the most important things is that I am able to be myself with my significant other. That’s where the fart test comes in. I can never be with someone if I cannot imagine myself at some point in the future being able to comfortably break wind in front of them. This is essential.

Oh, well.

Thanks, @lucyspet

for making me snort tea and scare the cats with my howling laughter.

I have never thought of this before, I swear.

Do you think it might scare my date off if I brought him a cup of tea on this tray?

Singlarity in 1938

Back in 1938 when housewives were douching with Lysol and getting black eyes for buying the wrong brand of coffee, single gals were getting their fair share of the fun from a society that believed that the fault always lies with the dame. Case in point: Dating tips from 1938. Here’s a preview:

Singlarity: Question of the Week

I have a question I’d like answered. Say you’re a man who is getting divorced and you have several small children. You’re still in love with your soon-to-be ex-wife but she’s done with you. Is it really fair for you to put yourself out there on the market before you’ve even gone to court to decide child custody and to use another woman to help you get over your ex-wife and rebuild your self-esteem, especially when that other woman probably won’t be the one to become stepmother of your children? Then again, you have to start somewhere, right?

The situation just seems incredibly unfair.

I wouldn’t mind hearing from the Strong Jaw of Justice on this one, just to get a manly-man’s opinion.