It might just be over

Anyone who has ever battled with an illness for a long period of time might be able to relate. Er, actually, I think I’m pretty much insulting anyone that has suffered like that with such a comparison, but really that is how I feel. So, I sincerely apologize. I am not trying to trivialize your experiences.

That said, I feel like I have been mentally ill for the past 5 months. I have exhibited strange behavior. I have said and done things I never thought that I would. I have apparently told somebody’s grandmother “Screw you!” I have refused to answer the phone (on Sunday nights). I have risked contracting viruses (on my computer). All along I have questioned my sanity. I felt like I was possessed and slightly out of control. Somehow, some way, I managed to keep doing my job, and prevent my friends and family from having me committed. Those of you who have been reading this blog know about my recent struggles and I appreciate your words of encouragement.

Now, I think I see the light at the end of the tunnel. I’m scared that I might not be fully cured and a sudden and deep relapse is a serious possibility. Still, I am beginning to feel hopeful for the first time in months. I’m waking up. The fog is clearing and the sun is shining, warming my face. I think I can make it now as the mad feelings have all but disappeared.

Still Want

So last year, Ayn Rant managed to talk me out of buying this black chevron leather motorcycle jacket. Then when I lost my will-power by Christmas, it was conveniently out of stock. Well, now it’s back and it’s on SALE  for next to nothing! Okay, $99 next to nothing. Still, that’s a bargain if I ever saw one and did I mention that I WANT IT?

I would kick ass in this and you know it.

It’s very simple and understated and they ship to Canada! Really, it is meant to be. So why am I having problems clicking the “purchase” button.

Setting the Record Straight

I watch True Blood for its intricate plot twists, snappy dialog, art direction and wonderful acting. That is all!

I am totally immune

Now if you believe that, I have some real estate on Mars I’d like to sell to you.

No Progress since we last blogged

So this is week … oh forget it, I have officially lost count. I am still lusting after Alexander Skarsgard. If I am still stuck in this place by Christmas, the Mounties may have to get involved. I was thinking that after the second season of True Blood ends in a few weeks, I might get a respite, but I’m not so sure now. It’s like Mr. Skarsgard is EVERYWHERE. He’s a favorite of the paparazzi and all the entertainment websites. There’s good and bad in that but all I care about right now is my sanity and its immediate return. Thanks to this gentleman I have “episodes” whenever the following things are mentioned:

Vampires

Sweden (and anything Swedish like Ikea, Abba and Zlatan Ibrahimovic)

Scandinavia

Orange Mocha Frapuccinos

Transvestites (don’t ask!)

Football/Soccer

Burritos

Pink Spandex

Vikings

Tank Top/Wife Beater

6’4″

Sargeant

Pokerface

GP

This list is incomplete. If you have any suggestions, specifically recommendations of other attractive men that could sway my attention and break the spell I am under, I would highly appreciate it. So far, these have not worked, despite their obvious appeal: Ryan Reynolds, Bradley Cooper, Channing Tatum, Taylor Kitch.

Still in lust

How long shall he reign?

I am now well into week 18 of my Alexander Skarsgård (pronounced Skarsh–gourd, apparently) lust with no ending in sight. Something must be done. I’ve got an appointment with my chiropractor for this afternoon. Maybe a good neck and back cracking and realignment of my spine will snap me out of this. If that doesn’t work, I’m supposed to see The Proposal with Ryan Reynolds in it this weekend. These days I am annoyed with Sandra Bullock but Ryan Reynolds is supposed to be cute and sexy in this, so it might be worth it. I have doubts though that Mr. Reynolds will be the cure I seek. Should this continue, my proficiency in Swedish may become quite alarming. How do you say “WTF” in Swedish? And seriously, WTF?

Real men aren't afraid to wear scarves.